Some Days

Some days
I wake up and just know
today I’m not human.
I go through the motions
with no pain and no sorrow,
no joy and no wonder,
seeing myself from outside.
Some days
I can’t move
because I feel so alone.
Nearly every one to whom
I’ve tried so hard to show my love
has left me in the dust, crying out.
Some days
nothing can touch me
so far above the rest of the world
the shit can’t hit me,
even with the fan’s help
I’m too far out of reach.
But most days
it’s debilitating;
the pain of knowing these people
don’t need me anymore.
I lay in bed, begging for a reason
to rise and be whole again
finding nothing to hold on to.