Hope

Hope
is new for me
I reach out,
tentatively,
slow so I don't spook it
cause it to run away,
it's light is soft
but my eyes take time
to adjust.

Hope
the word,
like the softest bubble popping
sweet and unassuming,
I like the word

Hope

Word Vomit

Whiner
little "ouch," little "ooh"s,
little complaints
thinking if you focus on the physical pain
if you can get others to focus on the physical pain
maybe you can ignore the real pain
a little longer
avoid treatment
avoid prodding
keep it hidden...
Maybe if you call enough attention to your paper cut
no one will notice the gaping hole in your chest.

Oversharer
little truth, little secrets,
a little too much information
maybe if you spill enough, if you talk so much
maybe then people will think they know everything
and you can keep the real truth in the dark
a little longer
avoid attention
avoid prodding
keep it secret...
Maybe if you talk enough about the smaller truths
no one will ask about the one that's killing you.

My Body is Mine

To the man

who thought he was cool

catcalling a twelve year old

as he drove by;

my body is mine

To the boys

in high school

who saw my shape

as a license to grab;

my body is mine

To the men

who treat my tits

as entertainment at parties,

props for their jokes;

my body is mine 

To the date

who thought the onslaught of no's

were a challenge

to turn them into a yes;

my body is mine

To the girl

who finally

said

yes...

your body is mine

To you, me,

too timid to walk away

when no was not enough,
say it;

My body is mine.

I Never Lie

When I am a speaker
I never lie;

secrets hide in the shadows of my mouth

I swallow details

filling up on hidden realities

hiding facts under my tongue...

When I am a poet,

truth

spills from my fingertips

through my pen, through the keyboard

onto the page

transparent

like the honesty in my eyes

The Difference

Touching
name calling
eye rolling
laughter
music

Netflix
soft blankets
touching
warm bodies
weekends

annoyance
butterflies
comfort
chemistry
touching

the only difference
is the touching.

tangled

The room is quiet

we are
tangled
in each other

legs around your waist,
sitting in your lap
with your head against my chest
motionless
holding you
like I'm holding you together

in reality your presence
this embrace
is patching me up
washing the infection from my wounds
I'm taking care of me
by taking care of you

we are
silent
and still

tangled.

Dive

When I get into a pool

I don't wade
the adjustment is too long
I don't have the patience

I like to get a running start
take a deep breath
close my eyes

and dive

headfirst

there's a shock
a splash
immersion
a sharp inhale

and finally
a smile

summer is no time for fear or apprehension
or allowing the threat of cold to put a stop to adventure.